I am really getting into the swing of this website thing. It is a exercise in human psychology...boys always describe what they imagine your body looks like whereas I concentrate on the other sensations.....how he smells, how he feels, how I feel, what I want to hear, what I want to taste!!!! It certainly beats playing solitaire!
You start by making small talk. And if he sparks my brain, my body tends to respond. The conversation becomes more flirty - and there is ALWAYS a flirty response to any remark! So we continue...moving slowly, luxuriating in every sensation, describing every subtle move, feeding and exploring off each other. Occasionally it does disintegrate into a comedy of errors but if the desire is there, the game will return. Alternating between describing what you want to do and what you want to receive but always skirting round the subject......the mind is a powerful thing...so I always stop short of decribing contact.
M was particularly good at it, he responded to my subtleties with a passion I needed. Slowly the momentum built, we slowed it down before rushing headlong into it and slowing it down again. And when we had tasted the entire menu, my skin glistened and I was out of breath. Unfortunately, he wasnt quite there....he continued and it just seemed silly then. Oh well, nothing for it but to feign hanging computer screen and being a girl, I cant possibly understand anything more about it!!!!!
Maybe I am a player. After all, I used poor M to satisfy my appetite! I know he enjoyed himself too and it was only cyberpudding. Its not as if I stood him up or anything! Question is what will I do when I want to go further???? Believe me, at this rate, I will
Monday, January 28, 2008
Saturday, January 19, 2008
The devotee
I have been on the website for some time now and patterns are beginning to emerge. Firstly, the boys differ based on where they come from...the Canadians are incredibly polite, to the extent you think they would ask for permission to proceed at that crucial moment, decimating all hope of release. I dont know about you but I like a little less formality with my passion. The Americans are not too bad until you get down to it, when they become very selfish and unimaginative...and dont get me started with the "daddy" fixation! The French are very matter of fact about the whole thing and get to the point without delay. They arent interested in words either, its the real thing or "au revoir". While I have to admire their clarity (you know EXACTLY where you stand), like the Americans, they make the fatal flaw of getting too heavy before I am immersed. So they appear silly, vulgar and a tad desperate! I wonder if they realise, or care. Now the Brit boys are a different matter. There are still some boys letting the side down by emulating the North American Contingent but for the best part, they are really good fun. They tease and banter like no-one else and dont rush things.
Within each population, there are sub species which are far more interesting to guess. Type 1 are the complete lost causes....so cack handed in their approach that they would struggle to get anyone to entertain their requests. In this group, I include the ones still living with their mother or who spend their time talking about their family. Type 3 are the players who are there to get their kicks with no regard for anyone elses feelings....these boys will do what they can to get the prize but once they have won, they lose interest. To them, the webiste is the arena of the game they WILL win, whatever the odds. I like these boys because they can up their game and I do like a challenge! However, they lose interest too quickly...no sticking power!
That leaves the majority who are on the website because they are missing something in their real lives. This can be as fundemental as the lack of intimacy and affection in a partner. Alternatively, its because they want to do things they cant do at home, like dominate, submit, roleplay, foreplay,etc etc. They dont want to hurt anyone and care about things like how am I going to get home, am I enjoying myself. Theres nothing wrong with this...in fact its the bravest and almost natural thing to do...after all, everyone deserves to be happy, dont they? Its curious that we can find happiness with stranger, even if it is for a moment.
Within each population, there are sub species which are far more interesting to guess. Type 1 are the complete lost causes....so cack handed in their approach that they would struggle to get anyone to entertain their requests. In this group, I include the ones still living with their mother or who spend their time talking about their family. Type 3 are the players who are there to get their kicks with no regard for anyone elses feelings....these boys will do what they can to get the prize but once they have won, they lose interest. To them, the webiste is the arena of the game they WILL win, whatever the odds. I like these boys because they can up their game and I do like a challenge! However, they lose interest too quickly...no sticking power!
That leaves the majority who are on the website because they are missing something in their real lives. This can be as fundemental as the lack of intimacy and affection in a partner. Alternatively, its because they want to do things they cant do at home, like dominate, submit, roleplay, foreplay,etc etc. They dont want to hurt anyone and care about things like how am I going to get home, am I enjoying myself. Theres nothing wrong with this...in fact its the bravest and almost natural thing to do...after all, everyone deserves to be happy, dont they? Its curious that we can find happiness with stranger, even if it is for a moment.
The holiday romance
Have been abroad to escape the world. Unfortunately, I have brought the rain with me. This is such a shame as a break is the perfect time to indulge fantasy. However, I have been sorely disappointed. The holiday romance must be where men have the supreme advantage. A player will excel on holiday as they take advantage of people who dont have their radar primed. Normal people will follow the cliche of making a connection with someone and ….But how do you make the connection? I am just not inclined to play like that….it feels cynical (Gentlemen Prefer Blondes), it feels silly (The Wedding Crashers), it feels gauche (Shirley Valentine), it feels sad (Roman Holiday). I prefer the long slow tease. That’s why the website works well. You can meet people who fire your brain and body at your own pace. Of course, I am in a buyer’s market on the website as there are so many more boys than girls. So I can be selective; I can allow my personality to shine. In the world of holiday romances, the pressure of time makes the whole thing more superficial and centred on looks. Hence the disappointment…,the girls are glamorous and stunning, but need to do more than just look at a menu. The men need to take lessons on all fronts. My fellow travellers feel I am too harsh but why settle for mediocre? The holiday romance also demands swift action, as opposed to the languid pace of the tease. Men are in their element here as they love taking the lead and being assertive. Knock-backs are possible but meaningless as the risks are small – eventually, everyone gets to go back to normal life. So I leave my escape empty-handed but at least I havent acted cynically.
Thursday, January 17, 2008
The website
Its so curious how these websites work. I have always thought of them as part of the modern day courtship ritual…after all, life is all about sex and procreation. So how do we make it easier for the sexes to overcome the obstacles? The girls go free…is this to make up for periods and childbirth? Not sure its enough but I suspect not many women would go on otherwise. Then you get to specify stuff you want like age, location and gender. Some sites go one step further, you can specify height, weight (in categories like slim, average, zaftig!!), ethnic origin etc etc. I am sure there must be websites where you can specify how much he earns! I must admit that one site details educational level and well, I must be a snob because I am attracted more to people with degrees than not. Sue me!
The good thing about websites is that you can be as honest as you want to be….so I regularly see the phrase, “I am not interested in anyone overweight” or “I am only looking for someone attractive”. Brutal as it is, I have to concede they should be able to say this stuff….especially as I want that same freedom. But please…a little compassion goes a long way!
Then you have to write a profile. Putting yourself on the market. Its all very unEnglish…..we just don’t do that sort of thing! But if we are going to do it, lets do it with style, some spirit and imagination….the websites try to help by offering suggestions as to what to write. However, I cannot imagine they say things like “tell them how you dress” and “what is your personal hygiene routine?” Yet, time and time again, I read, “I am always clean! Sometimes I dress smart, other times more casual”. I mean its hardly interesting, let alone flirty.
Anyway, once that’s done, you are ready for action.
The good thing about websites is that you can be as honest as you want to be….so I regularly see the phrase, “I am not interested in anyone overweight” or “I am only looking for someone attractive”. Brutal as it is, I have to concede they should be able to say this stuff….especially as I want that same freedom. But please…a little compassion goes a long way!
Then you have to write a profile. Putting yourself on the market. Its all very unEnglish…..we just don’t do that sort of thing! But if we are going to do it, lets do it with style, some spirit and imagination….the websites try to help by offering suggestions as to what to write. However, I cannot imagine they say things like “tell them how you dress” and “what is your personal hygiene routine?” Yet, time and time again, I read, “I am always clean! Sometimes I dress smart, other times more casual”. I mean its hardly interesting, let alone flirty.
Anyway, once that’s done, you are ready for action.
Monday, January 14, 2008
The dance...
I am sure the website is a melting pot of humanity but at the moment its full of guys casting their nets, hoping to capture a quick fix of excitement!!! Unfortunately, they come across as vulgar and worse, needy. I much prefer the man who can banter his way out of a corner and is prepared to stay the course.
Why do people like talking about their woes all the time? Thats not how it works...its certainly no way to attract moths to your flame! In fact, I know when things are going downhill. Its when the I feel like I am carrying the conversation, when the flirting has to be judged, when I end up lying to you about what I do and am reluctant to give you my msn address. By then, I am resigned to the inevitable car crash and I give up. If I am feeling a little frisky, I might play with you and start a fight..you boys are so easy to wind up, but yes, I do like to push buttons with all my might!!!!!
So what does the successful guy talk about?....food and drink, I guess. Your hobbies...music, sport, literature, history...anything that you are passionate about. I want to feel the fire in your eyes. I want to see you let go and drop your barriers. I want to know what you are like when you are happy. So I dont want to know that you are separated or recently divorced. After all, why are you telling me? Its so that I know that you arent over her. Alternatively, you seem to think its ok to tell me you want a special friend to share romantic evenings over lambrusco and soft focus lighting. The only trouble is this is all too earnest. Where did all the fun go?...I am not your counsellor or your mother....I am a playmate. I want to relax and giggle into the evening and the early hours of the morning. Just think of the games we could play with that much time!
Why do people like talking about their woes all the time? Thats not how it works...its certainly no way to attract moths to your flame! In fact, I know when things are going downhill. Its when the I feel like I am carrying the conversation, when the flirting has to be judged, when I end up lying to you about what I do and am reluctant to give you my msn address. By then, I am resigned to the inevitable car crash and I give up. If I am feeling a little frisky, I might play with you and start a fight..you boys are so easy to wind up, but yes, I do like to push buttons with all my might!!!!!
So what does the successful guy talk about?....food and drink, I guess. Your hobbies...music, sport, literature, history...anything that you are passionate about. I want to feel the fire in your eyes. I want to see you let go and drop your barriers. I want to know what you are like when you are happy. So I dont want to know that you are separated or recently divorced. After all, why are you telling me? Its so that I know that you arent over her. Alternatively, you seem to think its ok to tell me you want a special friend to share romantic evenings over lambrusco and soft focus lighting. The only trouble is this is all too earnest. Where did all the fun go?...I am not your counsellor or your mother....I am a playmate. I want to relax and giggle into the evening and the early hours of the morning. Just think of the games we could play with that much time!
Sunday, January 13, 2008
The underdog
Passion is the most under rated thing in the universe. If more people lived by passion, we would all be happier. Its all about living as if nothing else in the world matters, breaking the rules, grabbing life by the lapels and kissing long and hard. This is why regret and heartache is a waste of life.
That said, experiencing heartache is proof that passion was there and was real. For that alone, heartache is better than never loving!
That said, experiencing heartache is proof that passion was there and was real. For that alone, heartache is better than never loving!
The know-how
The best way to get a girl to melt is to coax and warm her. Put the heat up too high and she burns..too low and well, real women have never had much affinity with gazpacho! They say the best way to a mans heart is through his stomach, for a woman, its through her brain. She needs to laugh with you, which means you have to be able to hold up your end of the conversation for a start!
I guess women are like the cat who wouldnt be stroked in that any attempt to pet her will be treated with disdain. However, real women love being intrigued and teased.Show her whats on offer if only she would come a little bit closer....a gentle stroke in the air, an inch above her shoulder speaks volumes. It promises so much with so little effort. Almost instantly, she will want to rise up and meet your hand. Its her choice but it isnt time. Caress her shoulders, her hips, her wrists...(Jane Austen has something for even boys to learn from!)Drive her slowly out of her mind, waiting and wondering why the hell you wont make a move.
Yes, I know its naughty but we are here to have fun arent we? So we also know that the first fall from a position of delay and denial is so very delicious....
I guess women are like the cat who wouldnt be stroked in that any attempt to pet her will be treated with disdain. However, real women love being intrigued and teased.Show her whats on offer if only she would come a little bit closer....a gentle stroke in the air, an inch above her shoulder speaks volumes. It promises so much with so little effort. Almost instantly, she will want to rise up and meet your hand. Its her choice but it isnt time. Caress her shoulders, her hips, her wrists...(Jane Austen has something for even boys to learn from!)Drive her slowly out of her mind, waiting and wondering why the hell you wont make a move.
Yes, I know its naughty but we are here to have fun arent we? So we also know that the first fall from a position of delay and denial is so very delicious....
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